When I ask women what obstacles are in their way of weight loss, one answer that comes up repeatedly is consistency. They can’t be consistent! The women I talk to always wonder why they struggle so much with consistency. The answer to your struggles may be simple if you make consistency mean “being perfect”.
Consistency = perfection comes from the land of very restrictive diets.
Consistency, for most of us, has always meant perfection. Therefore, it has also meant restriction and deprivation. It’s kind of been this moral high ground or a badge of honor, and anything less than 100% might as well be 0%. It is hard to lose weight when we keep letting ourselves off the hook. It’s like being in a one-way relationship. You have to be in a two-way relationship with yourself in order to lose weight forever.
Consistency is not an all-or-nothing game.
If you look around at the diet and fitness landscape, we’re all inundated with people saying you can’t take any days off. No excuses. Just do it. Go harder. It can be very motivational, or you could use it against yourself. You could weaponize all of that and think things like:
- “I’m not hard enough.”
- “I’m not strong enough.”
- “I don’t do enough.”
- “I’m not cool enough.”
- “I’m not badass enough.”
- “I’m not all of the things I need to be so why bother.”
I want to offer you a new thought on consistency.
If you want to lose weight and keep it off forever, you probably are going to have to change your mindset. What if consistency means sustainability? Some of the diets and the ways you might be trying to lose weight are not sustainable. And frankly, really stressful on your body and mind.
So, I have to ask you a question.
- Would you let your 10-year-old self do any of these things?
- Would you let your 12-year-old self?
- Would you let your 20-year-old self?
- Would you let your daughters do this?
- Do you think any of this seems reasonable?
Instead, how about thoughts like:
- This one is something I can do.
- That works for my life.
- This works for my schedule, my body, and my goals.
- This is who I want to consistently be.
Our brains think consistency is following XYZ diet.
But that’s not necessarily true. Because those won’t last forever. They don’t last long-term. You might lose weight, only to gain it back. If we really think about the true meaning of consistency, it is something that keeps going. It’s really much more aligned with sustainability.
What if you think about creating a way to eat and work out that is something you can do for the long term?
This is you saying that it is something that you can do that works for your life, your schedule, your body, and your goals. Consistency is about losing weight, keeping it off, and still eating birthday cake on your birthday without feeling guilty.
Think about starting with the end goal in mind. When you create a way to eat, and a way to be fit, that isn’t so extreme, you will find consistency to be much more approachable, and not this huge gap to bridge.
What if you just are consistent all the time because you’re showing up for our goals?
It doesn’t have to be 1,000% every day. Just keep showing up. Don’t ghost on your goals or on who you want to be. I think consistency is really much more about mindset. It’s 100 % about your beliefs and making a decision to be consistent. However, I realize that sometimes our brains are like, “I failed, I guess I just don’t have it.”
Here are some tips and strategies to help you stay consistent.
Our brains need to start somewhere. So I have 9 things for you. I am thinking you’re going to be able to pick at least one or two that make sense to get started with so that you can start building up your consistency muscles.
It is a practice of showing up for yourself. You are going to need to keep a journal. Write all of these things down. Because if you don’t write these things down it’s very hard to be consistent.
Tip #1: Don’t pick unsustainable diets.
If you have something that you want to try, know where you’re going next. Otherwise, it’s the on-track, off-track scenario constantly. You’re thinking big picture here. Keep that in mind.
Tip #2: Have a goal.
You want to have very specific goals. It has to be specific. It has to be measurable. Does it have to be attainable? Not necessarily. When it comes to weight loss, it does seem like a lot of our goals are really just about the scale. So I’m going to encourage you to come up with a whole list. Put all these things in writing. Think outside the box and not just about numbers on the scale. Think about how you show up in your life, how you feel, how your clothes fit, and the things you would do if you lost weight.
Tip #3: Know your “why”.
Why is that important to you? Why is it a problem if every day you go to put on your clothes and they don’t fit in? It trashes your mood and confidence. You feel so embarrassed. You could see this gets uncomfortable. You need to let yourself go there.
Tip #4: Set up your environment.
Make your life easier by putting things in front of you that work. Take away the things from your view that don’t work. You’re the boss. Make it work for yourself.
Tip #5: Plan your meals in advance.
Write it down for the day. I don’t really mean meal prep. But instead, I mean planning your day in writing. When you are ready to move away from macros or a meal plan, this is the tool that helps you build in the birthday cake. Otherwise, you’re always going to be on and off a diet.
Tip #6: Plan out your fitness.
Plan out your workouts, your walks, your yoga, or whatever it is. Put that in writing. Hold yourself accountable to it. It makes it easier to achieve and takes out the guesswork when you plan it ahead of time.
Tip #7: Evaluate.
It’s really hard to evaluate your progress. What can you improve on? What is working for you? If you really think about it, your brain always leans negative. When you start putting things in writing, and you start taking ownership and showing up yourself, you build up days and weeks of these notes. You can do this!
Tip #8: Use other tools besides the scale.
You can make checklists, or charts. You could use a tape measure. You could take a photo of yourself every week. You could do a lot of different things to keep track of your progress. The scale is not consistent, even when we are. Even when we’re showing up and doing the work, eating on plan, and doing all of the things, the scale can go up. So you should have other ways to measure your progress.
Tip #9: Pick a sustainable diet.
In other words, don’t pick an unsustainable diet. If it’s not something you can do long term, then don’t do it. If it’s not something you would let your 10-year-old self do, then don’t do it. Consistency means it has to be sustainable.
Tip #10: Try out Tally Marks.
This is one of my faves. I take a dry-erase marker and I keep tallies on my bathroom mirror for every single day that I followed my plan. I put 1 tally mark for every day I did what I said I was going to do. If I ate what I said I was going to eat, then I give myself a tally mark. That’s how I use it. You could use it for workouts, water, or anything that you want. It is a wonderful visual reminder of your success.
Start writing some things down. Show up for yourself. That’s how you become consistent! When you focus on showing up for yourself, then you create the standard. You create the protocols. That’s how it is done.
NOTES IN ANCHOR
Consistency is NOT an all-or-nothing game.
I get it. If you look around at the diet and fitness landscape, we’re all inundated with “no days off”, “no excuses”, “just do it”, and “go harder”. It can be very motivational, or you could use it against yourself. You could weaponize all of that and think things like:
“I’m not hard enough.”
“I’m not strong enough.”
“I don’t do enough.”
“I’m not cool enough.”
“I’m not badass enough.”
“I’m not all of the things I need to be so why bother.”
I want to offer you a new thought. If you want to lose weight and keep it off forever, you probably are going to have to change your mindset. What if consistency means sustainability? Let’s explore how you can learn how to be consistent in your weight loss journey now!
ABOUT THE HOST
Bonnie Lefrak is a Life & Body Transformation Expert and Founder of Self Made, a program designed to help you tackle the physical aspects of health and weight loss as well as the beliefs and thoughts that drive our habits and behaviors. It is her goal to help women create certainty in their own lives, their own results, and their own abilities.
Weight loss is not about the one “right” diet – it is about MUCH more than that. Weight loss is not about the one “right” workout. Weight loss is not about being positive and putting a big smile on. Weight loss is about FEELINGS. All of them. Not trying to bury them or hide from them but knowing and allowing the full human experience.
Weight loss is not about grinding hustling and will powering your way to some end line. Transformation (when done well) is done from the inside out.
By addressing both the physical and mental aspects of dieting and weight loss, she has coached thousands of women ages 30-55+ from all over and helped them ditch the mindsets that are holding them back, achieve permanent weight loss, and get the bangin’ body of their dreams.
Bonnie is an expert at Demystifying weight loss. She helps you unf*ck your diet brain.
She is on a mission to help women love themselves, to find PEACE in the process of losing weight, taking care of themselves, and leveraging the power they do have to become who and want they want right now.
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